Goodmorning everyone! Yesterday I was feeling very undesirab..
Added 2021-09-05 16:01:20 +0000 UTCGoodmorning everyone! Yesterday I was feeling very undesirable. I got tiktok back and started feeling very insecure then I realized when I scroll tiktok I compare myself. So, to empower myself I’m showing off ALL my natural morning bod. This is how you’d wake up next to me, this is how you’d fuck me, this is how you’d listen to me, this is how you’d know me. I always feared being someone I’m not. Especially online. I hate pretending to be a glamorous person or a super cute perfect girl. I’m not. I’m me. My weight fluctuates, my tits sag, my pussy isn’t perfect and pink, my skin isn’t flawless and ALL OF THAT makes me. I’m perfect with all of my imperfections because nobody can duplicate that. Sure, I could get plastic surgery but why would I? To pretend to be something I’m not. I’ve contemplated it a lot. I thought plastic surgery would help me feel better about myself and with some people it really does, but something inside me told me no. I wanted to get my breasts removed, I wanted to get them bigger, I wanted to get other things done. It was unhealthy. I was obsessing. Then, I got banned from tiktok. I wasn’t on tiktok much anymore, I was going to therapy, I was seeing friends, I wasn’t stressing over what I needed to post, how I needed to look, how I needed to be perceived. I looked in the mirror and was actually okay with what I was seeing. I thought it was hot. I’d never been so close with my flesh suit before. I thought of the scene in ‘Silence of The Lambs’ - “would you fuck me? I’d fuck me hard. I’d fuck me so hard.” Little less psychotic than that but I was turned on. I was happy. I felt human. I’m human! This meat suit is just an add on to the actual experience in which I crave. Acceptance and authenticity. I started feeling sexier over time. I could see past all of the outer bullshit. I was being me. I was doing what I wanted. Being who I am. I’ve come to realize that a lot of my sexual attraction comes from WHO someone is. I honestly couldn’t care how someone looks. Honestly. So why did I care so much? I just wanted to feel like I was accepted. Like I was desired, but little did I know.. someone was DYING to get to know me. Me!
